Many of my friends keep on asking me about LOVE. They always ask me why I don't have boyfriend. Some of them are trying to find someone whom they think that I might like. Some knows me enough and understands me. Some are excited who’s that lucky or unlucky man. Some are blaming me.
Well, first and foremost, it is too personal to answer that question because I'm the type of person who is not showy. I don't want to be seen by my friends much interested with that. Well, I guess we all have our own preferences, right? For me, it is nothing to do with the "age", right? It is not important to know how old you are when you love. What matter is the importance of LOVING someone and how well you can express it. And for the sake of knowing me then i will try my best.

All of us have our own definition of love. We all have our own standards of determining love. But if love means having a relationship with someone whether girlfriend or boyfriend, well I guess I haven't love at all. If that is the real meaning of LOVE then, what can we call to the love we have for our parents?
But if you are going to ask what love is then I will answer you in two things. The first one is what I believed in what the bible says:

Love is patient and kind; it is not jealous or conceited or proud; love is not ill - mannered or selfish or irritable; love does not keep a record of wrongs; Love is not happy with evil, but happy with the truth. Love never gives up; and its faith, hope, and patience never fail. Love is eternal.

Yes, that is what I believed in. You don't need to find love let love find you. As what I said in my previous piece, you don’t have to reason out when you love, that's why it was called falling in love. You just let it fall and happen, you don’t force yourself at all. I know that I felt it in a way, the way that I learned to regret. Why? It is just so happened that I did not let my heart a chance to be LOVED for a deep reason. What the reason is? It is not only by my religion but my own preference. So please, don’t blame me at all. I know I've hurt you. But you don't know how much I get hurt, trying to refuse my feelings, trying to hold my emotions. It's really hard to do so. Doing two things at the same time? Loving you and forgetting you? It's really hard to lie with your heart. I've been hurting for three times already and most of my friend doesn't know about it, even my parents, too. Have you ever tried it? Try it! So you will know.

At first it's really painful most especially when you always see things which remind you of the shared memories like songs etc. Isn't I'm correct? It's really hard. But I've tried. The first one is really painful because I've loved him for a long period of time but then I must admit he is not for me. Second one is more painful because, I felt embarrassed. Why? He fooled me. I really hate him. And I told myself that someday he will know me. Now, he's here but I just neglect him. The third one is the most painful one. Right now, I'm still in the process of healing myself. It was never my intention to love him because I know he would not be mine. But I guess, no matter how hard I tried our path meets. I don't want to blame myself either him. But, somehow I'm happy to know someone like him. And it would be a part of mine heart.

The second one was LOVING UNCONDITIONALLY. Yes, unconditional love. No matter the hindrances, I still found myself loving them. They only differ in instances but I never knew that I fell for them.

In love, you don't have to reason out, why you loved that person. For it is not your mind who feels, it's your heart. As the quote says "don’t ask who, for love doesn't choose. Don't ask what, for love can give all. Don't ask how long, for love is forever. And lastly don't ask why, for love has no reason."

Too much to know about me…